Say It Ain't So, Joe!

The following has been lifted from Top Secret UFT files and memos, as well as the ACT site.

District Representative Selection Process Committee Convenes
The Committee to investigate the selection process for District Representatives, established by resolution of the Delegate Assembly on November 8, 2006, met for the first time on March 26, 2007. Considering that it took four months to convene the initial meeting, I don't expect any quick resolution to this important issue. Nonetheless, I will attempt the Herculean task of convincing my fellow committee members that a completely transparent democratic process, where members directly elect their representatives, is in the best interests of the union.

Why Herculean? Consider the makeup of the committee: chaired by President Weingarten (who has been appointing district reps since 2003), members include Secretary/Chief of Staff, Mike Mendel, Senior Assistant to the President, Jeff Zahler, a half dozen district reps, at least one borough representative, one or two other UFT officials, a gentleman from New Action, James Eterno from ICE, and myself, representing the Alliance of Concerned Teachers and the viewpoint of the Unified Teachers Party.

Much as I would like to share the details of the deliberations with my readers, I cannot, since all committee members were asked to keep the proceedings in strictest confidence. But rest assured I will publish a complete report once the committee has completed its mission and the cone of silence is lifted.

Our Nation Turns Its Lonely Eyes to The Unified Teachers Party

In light of our current landslide Victory, Max Factor and Snakehead are planning a UTP Victory Party Fundraiser that will finance our run for Presidency in the next election, if Unity hasn’t done away with elections altogether by then.
Max and the Snake together plan to fly solo in the one man UTP bi-plane “The Spirit of Shanker.” The flight will be from NY to Red Square. The flight will be accomplished without the aid of any compass, planning or navigational tool; so their flight will closely mirror the policies of our current union leadership.
Mudgett and Brace, on the other hand, having been notified by NORM that they, in fact, were the only opposition winners, are now headed to 52 Brdwy in the official UTP/Good Year dirigible. They plan to dock in Lakewood, NJ., after which they will take Randi’s limo to arrive at their coronation installation. There they will receive the Zahler-Bloomberg Lactose Intolerant Award for 2007.
It’s a new page in an old book for the UFT. No doubt there are big changes on the horizon that will continue the precedent set by the 2005 contract.